Punching the Nazi

<jats:title>Abstract</jats:title> <jats:p>This chapter argues for a discourse theory of civility, emphasizing civility’s core function: keeping parties in dialogue to solve shared problems. It takes seriously critiques of civility as phony, distracting, ineffective, abusive, and reinforcing structural injustice—and concedes that critics make many good points. Uncivil behavior can, at times, be effective at drawing attention to moral problems. However, when it becomes habitual—which is tempting, as incivility tends to escalate—it can frustrate our goals. This chapter argues that many critiques of civility are better directed toward hypocritical uses of the language of civility and the idea that oppressed people have a responsibility to make their oppressors comfortable. The chapter includes an acknowledgment of civility’s limits—at times, one has no choice but to break relationships and start over—but those times are rare, and often only detectable in hindsight.</jats:p>